Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Romans 12:19-21
Athletes expect a foul for a foul. I jab you; you shove me. Why? Because “an eye for an eye” has been accepted throughout history–in everything from sports to marriage to politics.
Revenge is humanity’s unwritten, ingrained code of fairness. It rings true for kindergarteners and CEOs alike. Selfishly, our hearts resonate with Paul’s “heap burning coals” metaphor in verse 20, and we’d like to start there. But revenge destroys peace among friends, strangers, and enemies. There’s got to be a better solution than getting back at people, right?
Fighting to make things right stems from our God-given desire for divine justice. We inherently and instinctually resist being wronged. But revenge is not justice. That’s why Jesus taught his disciples to keep their hearts and actions in check against opposition. “Pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44). “Do good to those who hate you” (Luke 6:27). Christ’s counter-cultural teachings, and two Old Testament references (Deuteronomy 32:35; Proverbs 25:21-22), set the stage for Paul’s godly instruction in Romans 12.
Deep down I wish Jesus and Paul gave me permission to get back at people that cross me. Wait, on second thought, they did. I’m allowed to “get back at people,” just not the way I’m selfishly prone to seek revenge. Escalating a conflict rarely, if ever, turns into a fair fight. The most God-honoring, justice-seeking, peace-bringing response is to let the Lord intervene, first in my heart and then the offender’s.
The best way to repay someone that wronged me isn’t “an eye for an eye,” it’s to pray and care for them. God gives us permission to get back at people by giving them over to him to overcome the evil in His time and way. What’s our role? Love people and let the Lord soften their spirit for good.
